Yes, I find it strange and actually A LOT weird. I don't feel 60. Perhaps I won't feel 90 when I get there either. I wonder if true age is a state of mind? I've known young people who seem so old. They even dress old. But it seems that the older I get the younger I feel. And, as I age, I realize that the greatest gift age has given me is the gift of
Long-term friendship holds with strong glue - but - does it really? Since friendship is a connection between people and people often find themselves in seasons of change, it stands to reason that the glue needs to be changed too. Friendship is a structure that requires maintenance. Without it, a friendship can flounder.
The sad thing about change is that while it is happening, it can lead to confusion for others. I've noticed that few people show patience when unusual or unexpected personality flashes occur. Few people step back and ask what is going on. Close family members might but people are, for the most part, reactive. Once I noticed this, I started becoming more watchful of the people in my life.
But changes, when they do occur, are living creatures. They demand a lot of us and the roads they lead us to sometimes aren't pretty and nor well-paved. So sometimes we find ourselves saying good-bye most unexpectedly to a friendship, a relationship. Perhaps we feel a sense of relief but I think more often we must feel a sense of regret, a sense of loss.
Along with friendship, the making and/or losing of connections, I also find myself traveling a faith road. This road has taken an unexpected u-turn and turned me back to my past. I've written previously about my dismay with the Church today and especially the state of worship. A month after returning to the Latin Mass, I find that I have rediscovered the reverence in worship that had all but disappeared for me. Some might think that I have returned to something that isn't relevant in the 21st century and certainly no one born around or after 1962 would have a memory of the Latin Mass and how meaningful it truly is. For me, it has become a matter of not knowing what you had until you lost it.
I find now that the reverence of worship I experience each Sunday actually fills me with a light that carries me through to a closer awareness of my daily life. And, since my daily life is firmly rooted in the 21st century, I am more aware of the moment to moment needs of others. Considering the level of global communication we share now, how could I not?
This aspect of my character has always been active but the weekly immersion in reverence of worship has actually acted as a sort of weekly booster shot to be more immediately responsive to need. This immersion is also teaching me to be more discerning of need, to understand that angels are not necessarily knocking when the need presents itself. Thoughts of angels causes me a lot of concern and after a bit I will be pursue this train of thought in Part II of my thoughts on turning 60.